Sex & Relationships for LGBTQ+ Christians
(straight, cis folks welcome too!)
Sex can be good. Very good, even.
Say goodbye to silly metaphors about sticky tape or chewed up gum, Biblical sexuality is so much richer (and more complicated)
When it comes to sex, you probably have a lot of people telling you what you should and shouldn’t be doing.
But what if the answer was inside you? In your body? If the divine was speaking to you not through the latest purity culture book but a still small voice?
For those of us who are Christian, we’ve got to take the messages from the Bible, the witness of Christian tradition, and our own lived experience to discern what a faithful sexuality looks like.
Is a two-millennia old religion even relevant to our sex lives today? We think so, but maybe not in the ways you expect.
If you want to merge your spirituality with your sexual values and practices (and make some fabulous synergy along the way), the resources here will guide you in doing just that.
Want some extra support and incredible community to hype you up? You’re invited to Sanctuary Collective.
Go on with your sexy, sacred self!
STEP ONE
Tricky Questions About Sex
Learn progressive, queer-inclusive, faith-based (and even Biblical!) responses to some of the most common questions about sex
Are you wondering what the Bible says about pre-marital sex? Or masturbation? Or sex with someone of the same gender?
Are you wondering how to move past purity culture?
Maybe you’re wondering if a Christian can or should watch porn? Or if it’s okay to be into kink?
Or maybe you’ve got other questions about how your sex life fits into your faith.
This workshop will dive in to what the Bible says about sex and give you a framework for answering questions about specific sexual practices. There will be plenty of time for Q&A and you can also submit questions ahead of time in case you want to be anonymous or just want to make sure we answer yours.
STEP TWO
Faithful Sexuality
Recover from shame & purity culture, integrate your sexuality and your spirituality, and live even more boldly into both
Unit 1: Working through shame + Rediscovering ourselves, our bodies, and our desires
Our bodies and our sexualities are a gift, but we’ve been told lies and separated from our goodness. We’re gonna learn some new lessons & skills
Unit 2: The Nuts & Bolts of Creating A Sexual Ethic, Pt 1
Tools and tactics for uncovering your values, desires, and boundaries
Unit 3: The Nuts & Bolts of Creating A Sexual Ethic, Pt 2
Discovering and articulating an overarching ethic (and what that means for you and your relationships)
Unit 4: Seeing And Creating Sacred Connections In Sex
How our sexuality pairs with the Gospel, enriches our understanding of it, and can be a faithful way of living into it
Have you come out as LGBTQ+ but feel there’s still a spark missing?
… that sexuality still feels compartmentalized from spirituality?
… and that your faith isn’t as alive, as embodied, as dynamic as you think it could be?
When you can integrate your sexuality and your spirituality, everything changes. For you and for those around you.
We’re so excited to share everything we know reconnecting with our bodies, developing a life-giving sexuality, and reigniting our faith so that you can see and understand this holy message, too.
The nuts and bolts of creating a sexual ethic
When it comes to sex, you probably have a lot of people telling you what you should and shouldn’t be doing. For those of us seeking to figure out sex within a progressive, LGBTQ-affirming Christianity, it can be tempting to look outside of ourselves for the answers. If the conservative pastor tells us one thing about sex, maybe we should look to a progressive pastor to tell us something different.
We aren’t going to do that.
W trust you — yes you! — to formulate a sexual ethic that works for you and is in alignment with your faith and your values.
When it comes to sex and your faith, we know that you want to get it right.
Our sexuality is tightly woven into who we are — it’s one part who our soul connects with and one part what our body feels.
It can be difficult to keep your head on straight when you’re trying to balance what you heard at church once, what you think you’re supposed to think, what your heart desires, what your body craves, what your friends tell you, what you see in movies, and on and on and on …
So let’s cut through all the noise, right? Let’s go straight to the source…
My entire life every message I received about sex was that it was simultaneously incredibly dirty and disgusting AND somehow also something holy and pure?
The first step in creating a healthy relationship with sex and your body is figuring out how to let go of shame.
The Sex Talk You Didn't Get In Sunday School
A few of our favorite podcast episodes covering all things sex & relationships
Still Scared About Sex & The Bible?
Sunday School Sex Ed
Why Should Christians Talk About Sex?
Does Queer Sex Make You Unclean? – Mark 7:1-8,14-15, 21-23
Looking for polyamory resources?
All of our resources on this page are designed to be inclusive of of open and polyamorous relationships (Shay is monogamous, Brian is polyamorous). Additionally, we have an entire section dedicated to polyamory-specific Christian resources.